So for those who have spouses and children, what's their take on your prolonged debilitating illness and inability to do many of things you used to do?
Do they now have to do most of the housework themselves?
Do you find yourself spending less quality time with your spouse because you always need to be resting in bed at every opportunity you get?
Does your children now have to prepare their own dinner, and even on occasions made meals for you?
Does your children complain about lack of recreational activities?
Is it that you cannot even get off the bed to tuck them in and kiss them goodnight....in fact, they tuck you in and kiss you goodnight?
 |
| Breakfast by my hubby Christopher |
 |
| Dinner by my 12-yr-old son Kayden |
That is exactly how my home-life has come to be for me during my illness. And unintentionally, sometimes we can become so taken up in our own little world concerning our illnesses, that we forget that we have people around us who care, and the adjustments they might have had to make as a result of our limitations can be taken for granted. We may forget that perhaps they too may be stressed, or perhaps sad, knowing that there's nothing much they can do to help our situation. But remember....circumstances weren't always this way, and this has been as sudden a change for them, as it was for you.
So ask yourself:
Do I acknowledge what my spouse has been doing for me since I have been down with the Chik-V? Do I commend him/her and express gratitude?
Is there some way that despite my limitations, I can reward my child for his/her understanding and assistance? Are there other activities you can involve yourself with them?
While we may want to use time to rest at the end of day or weekend, we need to show our support to our spouse/children who have also changed their lives due to our prolonged illness.
So let us sit back and think of the little ways we can show our spouses and children that we are not neglecting them, even if we have to grind ourselves in pain to do so.
Try to smile and laugh a little (even if your jaw feels like it's bolted with wire...lol).
Ask them about their day; how has it been and sincerely listen (don't interrupt to talk about your pains).
In your better moments, volunteer to assist in the smaller, simpler tasks.
Remember to still share appreciative hugs and kisses (just remind them no bear hugs...lol!)
Try to join them for meals whenever possible...they'll appreciate your presence.
And....though this may be difficult, let's try to 'put a lid on it' about our pains...they don't need to hear about it repeatedly...just saying.
We need to do our part to make this journey of illness an easier one for our loved ones also.
Your fellow Chick,
Chick-Very
.jpg)
.jpg)
